Words on Paper
A dream becomes very real with a little bravery and a few pieces of paper.
I hit publish on my writing website last night. It was early in the morning now and that groggy feeling from staying up too late was lingering. As I sipped my homemade veggie juice and started to wake up, a feeling of accomplishment came over me. My vision of a website with a magazine feel had become something more.
I was staring at it and it was staring back at me.
There it was on the kitchen table. My laptop with my stories on the screen. The sun was starting to rise, and light poured through the bay window into the kitchen. This is very real, I thought.
It was time to start my day. I was headed off to work, to my real job. Writing is just a hobby. I pondered this thought for a little longer.
As I stepped into the shower, I felt panicked. No one was hiding in the tub ready to jump out at me like in a horror movie, but the fear felt just as intense. How am I going to do this? How am I going to publish essays consistently? What if I run out of ideas?
And then, the idea for this story popped into my mind while I was washing my hair. I took this as a sign that everything will be ok.
I dreamt about having a portfolio of work since college. Whether as a hobby or professionally, that didn’t matter. I needed a creative outlet. I always wished I could sing and belt out a song like Kelly Clarkson, but I can’t hold a single note. So, I crossed that idea off my list.
My college studies in journalism and writing kept whispering at me. And the need to do something more expressive had been talking louder to me lately.
I stopped resisting this urge as I had so many times before. I wrote an essay, and then another, and then another. I researched publishing options when I had a small collection of essays.
A few weeks later Sunday Morning Coffee came to life.
I continue to stare at my writing website and now it speaks to me. It was never about whether I was capable of putting words together to make a fun, reflective, thoughtful or entertaining story. It was being comfortable enough to put my words out there for others to read.
